By Jamie Gangoo. Setting down house rules becomes somewhat important when customers may consist of persons with various temperaments, quirky habits, hungry bellies and aggressive behaviours. For maxi drivers, these rules are mostly printed, laminated and stuck at strategic points in their maxis, that make for places the eyes can comfortably rest upon (as opposed to naturally resting on the back of someoneās head). They are the signs you must find.
Classic Leather Shoes – Toddler
US$40.00
Rude signs
Of course there will always be the persistent rule breakers who take advantage of driversā averted eyes and sneak bites of pies, roti and KFC, despite the shiny āNo Eatingā sign before them. However, the presence of signs makes it easier for a driver to press the eject button without bothering to offer an explanation.
In the process of trying to maintain orderliness to their liking, some drivers take a humorous path that may be riddled with sexual innuendos, others make you question their experiences, while others can be considered, well, a bit rude.
No slamming
Upon entering a maxi, one may find standard signs such as āNo slammingā and āNo eating, drinking or smokingā. However, some drivers have a tendency to elaborate on these as shown in the following list of common maxi signs:
ā No loud cellphone music. (Understood.)
ā No sleeping. (Difficult, but also understood.)
ā No love making. (Make war instead!)
ā No obscene language. (ā¦with the exception of the driver.)
ā No eating of nuts. (Clearly, this driver is traumatised.)
ā No clipping of nails. (May I file them, then?)
moto g pure
ULTRA-WIDE DISPLAY.
2-DAY BATTERY
Color Deep Indigo
Internal Storage 32GB
Unlocked
Was US$159.99 Now US$139.99
No cellphone music
Some drivers also find it necessary to simplify the āno cellphone musicā rule to a simple equation (since youth like shortcut): Cellphone music + Maxi music = Noise. Yes, I agree, while also acknowledging that some maxi music alone falls under the category of ānoiseā.
The āno sleepingā sign can also come in various forms, such as āIf yuh sleepy, doh sit in frontā and āSleep before you come, donāt come here to sleep!ā Of course this is understandable, as you can get pickpocketed or miss your destination while sleeping.
Guilty of sleeping
However, things become ambiguous when considering the sign that specifies that a passenger should not be seated in front if he/she is sleepy. Why address these passengers in particular? Perhaps the driver is one of The Talkatives, who constantly share their opinions on every current affair and bacchanal to the person at their sides, despite the personās disinterested face and on-the-cue grunts.
The reason may also be that these drivers feel disrespected ā like personal chauffeurs who drive sleeping passengers around, whilst fighting sleep themselves. Or maybe they just donāt want to hear your snores over the sound of their music. Whatever the reason, I am guilty of sleeping the time away on numerous occasions.
Galaxy A32 LTE 128GB
Was US$270.00 -8% Now US$249.00
IN STOCK
SKUĀ SM-A325MZKKTPA-1
- Amazing screen, super smooth scrolling.
- Minimalist design with eye-catching style.
- Amazing camera, capture every detail.
Signs behind the driver’s seat
Stuck behind the driverās seat, one may also find the sign, āDoh pull on meh seatā or āDoh poke meh, nahā. The latter might ward off some passengers, but completely be overlooked by others who become confused/angry when the driver remains insolently silent as they jab his shoulder to pay him.
I dutifully obey that sign, after an incident that occurred on the main road that seriously made me rethink my strength. As the maxi stopped to let a passenger out, I moved to the seat right behind the driver to pay him, as I had almost reached my destination. I, God help me, poked the man (in my defense, there was no sign indicating otherwise).
Driver (in vex voice): āSo yuh come in front to hit meh?ā
Me (confused): āNo, ah was giving yuh moneyā¦ā
Driver (while glaring at me through the rearview mirror): āSo yuh does hit people when yuh giving them money? Yuh boss does hit yuh when he paying yuh?ā
Whaā¦ what? The man then proceeded to suck his teeth, wring up his face and refuse to take the money until I told him I would be getting out now, thank you.
Moving along, here is a list of a few more signs I have encountered on my maxi adventures (some paraphrased):
ā āOne bell ā stop, two bells ā right hereā¦ but, but, if you want to play with a bell, play with yours and leave mine alone!ā (No problem, Sir.)
ā āDonāt call me āDriveā. My name is Bryan.ā (Should I add āMrā to that too?)
ā Donāt bawl in my beepinā head! (Fix your beepinā bells!)
ā Buckle up, itās the lawā¦ and it also makes it harder for the aliens to abduct you. (Well, when you say it like that.)
ā This is not a plane. Leave earlier. (Shux and I was expecting a meal soon.)
No breaking of rules
Yes, maxi drivers have come up with humorous ways to maintain some order and cleanliness in their maxis, with some also attempting to address pet peeves and ego issues.
No doubt, we, the passengers, might disagree with some, while finding others totally unreasonable (how can I not fall asleep on a journey from Port of Spain to Arima after work?). However, the driver did clearly state where he/she stands, which leaves us with three options:
Ask politely if you may break the rules. (e.g. āO gawd Drive, ah walkinā with meh belly in meh hand. Leh meh just take a bite nah. I aināt go make no mess.ā)
Silently grumbles.
Hit the exit.
No, sneaking bites is not an option. Thereās enough disrespect going around, without us adding to it by breaking driversā rules in their own maxis. Ent?
October 2014 – Issue 12 Ā Ā Ā www.sweettntmagazine.com
Active Learning in the Classroom
Every month in 2024 we will be giving away one PlayStation 5 Pro. To qualify join our Facebook group, TikTok and Subscribe to our Sweet TnT Magazine YouTube channel
Apple – iPhone 14 Pro Max 256GB (Unlocked, US version)
US$1,359.99 US$749.99
When you buy something through our retail links, we may earn commission and the retailer may receive certain auditable data for accounting purposes.
You may also like:
Bamboo cathedral in Chaguaramas
Road trip to the Toco Lighthouse
Caroni Swamp just a boat ride away
Serene Knolly’s Tunnel in Tabaquite
Relaxing at Scarborough Botanical Gardens
A day at the Emperor Valley Zoo
The Oval memories of my first visit
Piparo a picturesque rural village
cbdMD Starter Kit
SUPPORT A SENSE OF CALM
ENHANCE EXERCISE RECOVERY
CONTAIN NON-DETECTABLE LEVELS OF THC
MANAGE SIGNS OF DAILY STRESS
COMPLEMENT A HEALTHY WELLNESS ROUTINE
A view of Fort James in Tobago
Scenic Port of Spain on Lady Chancellor Hill
The look-out at Mount St Benedict
Journey to Biche to attend Stoveman’s funeral
Samsung Galaxy S22 Ultra 5G –Ā (Factory Unlocked) Buy Now